No one's ever seen you without makeupFriday, December 8, 20062:31PMOkay, it's that time again, guys. I'm changing journals for the .... 4th time in my livejournal career. Thursday, December 7, 20063:22PMQuote of the day. Current mood: elohel 4:03AMdude, i'm fucked up, Tuesday, December 5, 20061:25AMOkay, so I cut my hair off yesterday. Friday, December 1, 20069:33PMSo, things are okay. Kyle ... I don't even know what to say about that, he got a new job, the guy spent a week "training" him (aka having him move furniture and cut lawns) and then let him go today because "he wasn't learning fast enough. LOL! Anyways, my mom is loaning us some money to help us get through, rent is in, bills are mostly paid and shit isn't sucking as bad. In other news, something furry keeps touching my leg but when I go to look what it is, nothing is there. Current music: Alanis Morisette - Uninvited (random, I know) Wednesday, November 29, 20063:44AM[03:41] Anfarati: "Does he love you" Sunday, November 26, 200612:47AMThings are great. I'm pretty wonderful, myself. Nothing is getting me down recently. I've learned that it's all going to be okay. If not now, someday. I've learned to make peace with my memories. They were just bringing me down anyways. I've made everything all sparkley in my mind for far too long. Kyle went to his brother's house tonight, leaving me to myself. I've decided to take full advantage of this, playing music that I want to play at full volume. Hell fucking yeah for alone time. The baby's asleep and I'm just hanging out with myself. I'm pretty damn good company, if I do say so myself. and I do. Current music: Ben Folds Five - Lullaby Saturday, November 25, 2006Tuesday, November 21, 200612:30PMI'm so fucking tired of hearing "that's really shitty work" "i can't do that, blah blah blah". HE NEEDS A MOTHERFUCKING JOB. I DON'T FUCKING CARE IF HE LIKES WHAT HE'S FUCKING DOING OR IF IT'S NOT HIS IDEAL JOB. He just fucking expects me to make all the bills this month easily while he spends my money. It's hard, he doesn't seem to understand how fucking stressed I am. He says he does, but he's not the one out there TRYING to make rent, but knowing it's going to be virtually impossible. It's ridiculous how picky he's being. Current mood: fuckingfrusterated. Friday, November 17, 20062:51AMDriving a new MUCH bigger car for the first time in the rain at midnight ... dangerous Tuesday, November 14, 20061:42AM - but who cares?i'm so ridiculous good. Current mood: it feels like the surreal life Current music: MTV makes me wanna smoke crack - Beck Monday, November 13, 200611:20PMThings are good. Current music: The Smiths - Every day is like Sunday Friday, November 10, 200612:23PM - omg, i LOLOLOLOLed so hard.
Current mood:  amusedThursday, November 9, 20063:19PMi was going to kill this journal last night. i made a new one. i'm trying to start a new me. i've been going back to old habits and i'm just generally not liking the person i've become. i'm really going to make an effort to redo my life. i only get to do this once, for sure, so i should try and do it right. i'm going to have a long talk with kyle tomorrow. let him know where i stand in everything. i'm not willing to just float through life any more. i'm really not. i'm going to go enroll in school for the spring as soon as humanly possible. let's get this fucking life thing started. i'm over struggling. i'm ready to live. i can honestly say that now. i want a good life for myself and my daughter. I took Saturday off and I plan on going somewhere, doing something. It's a new day. I need to treat every day as if it's my last, now. Make up for lost time. Current music: LCD Soundsystem - Thrills Wednesday, November 8, 200610:49PM - you dont have to have a subject hereSo, I called out from work tonight on the premise that I haven't had more than one day off a week in ... months. I'm exhausted and spreading myself far too thin. I was all e-dramatic the other night and might have lost a friend. Oh, well. What can I say? I was drunk, and I've said sorry. Nothing is really going on in my life that's of any importance. I should be looking into school for the spring, but I'm not quite yet. I'm already spread so thin, but I don't know, I don't want to eternally have to work like a dog to make ends meet. I want to be able to say I'm not going day to day paycheck to paycheck. I want to be able to go out and spend 100 dollars on my daughter without thinking about it every now and again. It's not even about the material things, it's about the basics. The last few months I've just barely made rent on time. I mean, I always do, but you know, the stressing sucks. Does anyone even eljay any more? or is it all moved to myspace. I am addicted to myspace. Current mood: None, or other Current music: Kyle is snoring Tuesday, November 7, 2006Monday, October 30, 20069:19PM - big brother is watching you
Current mood: don't stalk me, bitches Current music: none Saturday, October 28, 200611:06PMIt's early. and quiet. I'm listening to quiet classical while dicking around on the internet. It has quickly become stale. I've seen everything that I had missed in the last couple of months and my buddies are rarely online to talk to. I really have no life outside of work, so i'm probably on the internet a little bit more than I need to be. But, that's okay. I'm feeling really weird now, or I guess it's just weird that I'm not feeling much of anything. I'm usually this fireball of overflowing emotion, and right now I just ... you know, am. It's a nice feeling. It's funny, as I'm listening to a very sad feeling piece. Moonlight Sonata. In me, it usually strikes a feeling of grief, right now it's not even getting a rise out of me. I feel detached, but in a very refreshing way. I'm not wallowing in this that or the other. (fucking emo, lol) Current mood: none (or other) Current music: Keane - With or without you (U2 cover) Navigate: (Previous 20 entries) |
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